MOM CONFESSIONALS

As some of you know I did something pretty crazy recently… I went back to college.  I know, pretty trippy huh?  One of my professors put it best, I’m not in Kansas anymore!  Yea, most definitely not… so while I should be studying…like RIGHT now, I’m blogging… hey, a girl needs a break every now and then.

One of the hardest things I have had to deal with is leaving my kids.  For those who have been with me for the long haul, ya’ll remember Round 1.  I’m going through the exact same emotions I went through when I first went back to work after the toddler’s birth.  A lot of anxiety and a lot of crying and we all know how that ended — quit my job and became a stay at home mom.  I feel almost like a cry baby because it should be easier the second time around after all I did get a wonderful 5 and a half months with my son as opposed to the 8 weeks I had with my daughter.  I’ve also been so incredibly blessed to be home with my daughter for the past couple of years and watching her bloom into the most amazing little girl.  But nope, it seems even HARDER the second time around cause now I have two babies I will miss every second of the day.

The worst days are the days that I only get to see my son’s sleeping face.  Yea, the toddler’s always around to greet me at any hour but in those moments all I can think about  is the fact that I will be missing things like his first crawl, or the first time he stands up, his first steps.  I might be a little over dramatic to think I’ll miss every single one of those moments but I know my mother in law won’t relish in them the way a mother will.  I sometimes pause to think if she’ll even notice that, “hey, he can sit up now!”  or “hey, he’s crawling!”  I know that they are in wonderful care with my mother in law but yet an intense jealousy rips through me thinking of all the bonding time she’ll have with both my kids.  I almost feel at a disadvantage having been home with them.  As if I hadn’t been home with them all this time, it wouldn’t hurt so bad. Not that I would trade any minute of spending time with them for the otherside — NEVER!

I thought I would have been more prepared for the whole school routine.  I did spend almost a year taking pre-requisites for this program while taking care of a toddler and waddling my pregnant butt around but nothing could have ever prepared me for this.  My brain definitely isn’t as sharp as it use to be.  I find myself having to read things over and over again and still wonder if I retained it at all.  My old tried and true study methods don’t seem to apply here.  Although I seem to be blessed with a youthful appearance, once the amusement wears off that I’m not a 20-something year old, wish I was…rather a thirty… with two kids, I definitely feel out of place amongst all the young-uns.  It didn’t seem all that long ago that I was in school studying but I guess it really was.

There are days I am so tired I just want to give up.  I find myself willing myself to go on and wonder how much more I can handle.

At the same time I try to stay focused.  I will get all this and more once I finish school.  I have to often remind myself that I am doing this FOR them so I can have the flexible schedule or the varying career paths a nurse can take.  I will be that PTA mom organizing the bake sale, going on school trips, packing their lunches and planning Disney vacations.  I try to stay positive and take one hurdle at a time.  I know my kids will be so proud of me someday.  But for now, I’ll be proud of myself if I can survive this and graduate.  I am grateful for the opportunity and incredibly blessed to have the support of everyone around me.

There are so many days that I get caught up in the daily routine of life.  These days I can barely come up for air let alone have the time to express to my husband just how much I love him and miss him.  Yes, miss him.  Although we live in the same house, sleep in the same bed, every minute of our days consist of just making it to the next one because we’re so busy.  It’s funny that I can’t find the time to convey my thoughts, but its in the busiest of days that I start to notice things like how wonderful and amazing my husband is.  I’m reminded of why I fell in love with him in the first place and why I love him more now that I ever did.

My husband is my rock.  He loves me even when I’m not so lovable.  He loves me even if I snap because I’m under so much stress.  He even loves me when I’m acting like a diva demanding things left and right from him, as if he doesn’t give me enough already.  He has the biggest heart and…. ahem… I am selfish.  While I am trying hard to learn to be more like him and deserving of him, it doesn’t come quite as naturally to me.  He puts me, the kids and anyone else before himself.  Our happiness comes first and I want to hit myself for every time I gave him a hard time about wanting to play golf or doing something for himself.

He is the most amazing father.  Although I spent quite a lot of breathes griping about why he never picked up a book to read on childcare, I now realize it’s because it comes so naturally to him.  My favorite moments are little ones like watching the excitement on my daughter’s face when he comes through the door, dropping everything to give his little girl a gigantic hug and kiss.

While I’m the neurotic one setting rules and boundaries about things like how many hours of TV she can watch and what she should be learning at this stage and that, he’s the one who’s actually taking the time to make sure that happens.  Even after the longest of days at work, he will patiently sit with her and practice her writing.  He will sit there and listen to her nonsense stories and laugh with her.

My husband takes care of us all.  Sometimes I imagine that if he were on a TV show, the background song would be gently playing Bob Marley’s Don’t Worry, Be Happy.  I really don’t think he knows anything else but to do just do that for us.  It’s second nature.  Every time I turn around he’s doing something for us.  Sometimes it’s something simple like making sure to mow the lawn, chasing bees off our property so the kids can play outside, fixing all sorts of knick-knacks in the house.  No matter how stressed out I get about things, he always finds a way to take care of things, whether its holding my hands through a difficult medical situation or finding a solution for what seems to me as an impossible task.  He is our very own knight in shining armor.  When I start stressing out about things, even though his stress and burdens are so much more than my own, he makes relieving my stress his priority.  Sometimes relieving my stress adds more stress onto him and he does everything in his power to make sure I never know that.

He’s my biggest fan.  When I decided to switch careers in a difficult economic environment, he was nothing but supportive.  Even though we were missing an entire income, he never let the stress of it show.  Instead he was there helping me study, cheering me on and encouraging me to forge forward whenever I doubted myself or thought I couldn’t do it anymore.  He believed in me even when I didn’t.  You know who he reminds me of?  The Giving Tree.  My husband is the tree.  I’m not entirely sure I’m deserving of such a great love, but I’m incredibly grateful for it.  I’m his biggest fan.  So to my husband,  Happy Father’s Day!  We love you more than anything else in the whole wide world!

Given the emotions of the day, all I wanted was an ordinary Sunday.  I had earlier on in the week committed to having regularly scheduled “traditional” Sunday family dinners.  What would make this dinner different and distinct is that I have challenged us to instead of looking for the best take-out, to actually cooking it ourselves.  I was inspired by one of my twitter friend’s, Jennifer Perillo’s Simply Red (Marinara sauce) recipe and my Aunt’s ability to always make homemade sauce despite her ever busy schedule.  I thought to myself, if she can do it, so can I.

So despite all things out of control that day, I took matters into my own hands and decided to regain some control back by making a simple delicious meal for my family to enjoy.  I love to cook and don’t do it often enough.  I’m actually quite good at it but only tend to show my skills for guests — what that translated to was big meals only, never small family sized meals.  This was an experiment in returning to the simple joy of cooking.

Out came the can of Muir Glen Organic Whole Peeled Tomatoes with Fresh Basil (Jennie’s recipe called for San Marzano tomatoes and fresh basil leaves), 4 cloves of whole garlic and 8 baby carrots (instead of suggested pinch of sugar).  Since I needed to be quick, I threw the baby carrots into a food processor until it was finely chopped.  I sauteed the whole cloves of garlic in  olive oil slightly burning them by accident despite it being hard to do, and murphy’s law practically dictated I be the rare case.  I poured the tomatoes into a bowl and gingerly hand crushed them to a consistency I liked.  It was a lot easier than I expected and getting my hands into it made it more fun and authentic.  I poured it into my red cast iron pot (just like the one in Jennie’s picture!), added a little sea salt and fresh cracked pepper and let it simmer while I readied the pasta.

Ever the skeptic, my darling husband was not too sure about me making fresh marinara sauce.  When I added chopped baby carrots, I could see him raising his eyebrows at me and thinking to himself, this wasn’t his version of traditional marinara sauce.  Raise your eyebrows at me anytime you want I thought to myself, but I was sneaking in some more vegetables into this meal if I could, especially since Ava abhors carrots for some reason unknown to us.  I figured and hoped it was so finely chopped and would soften to an unnoticeable consistency while simmering in the sauce.  20 minutes later, we had ourselves a meal and it was a smashing hit!  Even my darling husband who doesn’t dole out compliments when it comes to my cooking gave me his surprised shrug and declared it “pretty good!”  We even made a second pot of pasta just to finish the sauce.  Ever the perfectionist, the only tweaks I’d make next time is finding Organic San Marzano (because Jennie swears by them) tomatoes in a BPA-free lined can.

After all the dishes were cleared and the kids bathed, teethes brushed, I caught the above moment as my family unwound in my daughter’s room and prepared for the upcoming week.  An Ordinary Sunday it was…

{ disclosure : invited to private blogger reception }

From Left to Right, Top to Bottom: LG Front Loader in new color – Chardonnay, LG LuV200 Close-Up, LG LuV200, LG Luv300 Close-Up, LG LuV300, LG Top Loader in Graphite

A few weeks ago I had the opportunity to check out the new line of LG Home Appliances at the LG Clean House, an impressive display of all things LG including the staging items like their TV’s and Home Theater systems — I totally was eyeing their iPod compatible LG Network Blu-Ray Home Theater System.  Already an owner of their older LG Washer/Dryer Tromm line, what was then the latest and greatest in that realm, I was excited to see what new developments had come out of their R&D labs.  I had been sold on the economy of having a front loading washing machine, but over time I began to realize the advantages that I once took for granted when I previously owned a top loader.  Gone were the days that I could simply let a wash soak over night for extra deep cleaning.  Calculating the cost differentials, I guessed I could live without the over night soaking feature but the all new LG Wave™ Series has now made that cost differential inconsequential with thier state of the art Top Loader that boasts both high-efficiency and energy-efficiency at its best.  It uses 40% less water than traditional top loaders and saves over 51% of energy usage in the ColdWash™ option.  They really have thought of everything down to the LG Wash/Rinse Optimizer™ which automatically senses water hardness and detergent level and then adjusts the cycle length to maximize performance.  Traditional agitators in top-load washers are known for being rough on clothing but LG’s innovative WaveForce™ technology eliminates the agitator and moves the water in the tub so that it continuously penetrates fabrics with high-speed spinning for a thorough and gentle clean.

Appealing to the techy side of me, the same goes with their sleek looking line of new Vacuum cleaners for the US market.  Coming in two models, LuV200 and LuV300, it utilizes a dualforce suction that gives a wider cleaning range, not just centered like other traditional vacuum cleaners.  This state of the art vacuum cleaner utilizes a Dyson similar cyclonic action but with the added intuitive Kompressor technology combined with a  larger bin.  It compresses the dust intake to hold three times more household dust than non-compressor models and eliminates the mess sometimes associated with emptying the bin.

With LG’s Click ‘N Go™ wand (available on the LuV300 only), the vacuum’s radio-frequency wand allows consumers to control the unit remotely from the wand when it is detached from the base, making it easy to clean stairs, upholstery, and other hard-to-reach areas. Also included is a pet hair tool with an air-turbine powered horsehair dusting brush which is great for stairs and interiors, as well as removing pet hair from fabrics and carpets.

Both vacuum’s powerful engines provides superior suction power, picking up 99 percent of dust on hard floor surfaces and 70 percent of dust on the carpet, while the HEPA filter captures 99.97 percent of allergens such as dust mites and animal dander.  The LuV300 is certified asthma & allergy friendly™ by the Asthma and Allergy Foundation of America (AAFA), the oldest and largest independent non-profit organization dedicated to helping consumers and patients with asthma and allergic diseases.

Both the Washer/Dryers and Vacuums are available in Late Spring.  The LuV200 ($299 MSRP) incorporates all the same core functionalities of the LuV300 ($399 MSRP), aside from the Click ‘N Go feature, and includes a 30-foot auto-rewind cord, the industry’s longest auto-rewind cord length.  The LuV300 features the industry’s longest cleaning reach, with an extra-long 40-foot cord and 15-foot hose.

{disclosure : written by guest writer | i am a bravado ambassador }

You want your baby to thrive and grow steadily. Once you get the hang of breastfeeding you will begin to easily recognize your baby’s signs of fullness and contentment. You should be checking in regularly with your pediatrician to make sure your child is thriving and growing. Your baby’s weight and behavior are also great indicators of their health. But there’s one more thing you can check, on a more daily basis, that is a great indicator of their well being. Diapers!

Diapers are the earliest and the easiest sign to measure quickly whether your baby is getting enough from feedings. In a nutshell, what goes in must come out. So if your baby is taking in enough food, you’ll know it from his diapers.

Here’s the part of parenthood that shows unconditional love. Yes, you need to check (or rather, inspect) your newborn’s diapers, on a continual basis. It’s amazing how much information you can glean from dirty diapers.

Let’s start with stools: in other words… poo!

Frequency:
The rule of thumb is that the number of stools your baby passes should correspond to the days of your baby’s life. Day 1, at least 1 stool; day 2, at least 2 stools, and so on. But don’t worry, this levels off around 4-8 stools per day. Your baby won’t be having 27 stools on day 27!

These numbers are minimums; if your baby has more stools, that’s just fine. Some babies have stools after every feeding – up to about 10 on day 7. Just make sure that in these first few weeks your baby is having at least 4 stools a day. These should be about the size of a large button or coin, or larger. Around weeks 5-7, don’t be surprised if this pattern changes.  At that point your baby may go days without stooling or may only have 1-2 stools a day. This is normal.

Appearance:
Day 1: Meconium – This is the stuff that your baby swallowed in utero. When it comes out, it’s black, tar-like, sticky and copious. Even though it’s not a stool caused by feeding, it’s important to monitor to make sure that it’s coming out. Your newborn should have at least 1 meconium stool, or more, on their first day of life.

Day 2-3: Transitional stool – This stool color is brownish-black. It is now moving away from being meconium and showing the effects of what your baby has begun to eat in the first few days of life and is becoming progressively browner. Don’t be alarmed if it appears dark green as well – this is all perfectly normal.

Day 4: Yellow stool – Now your baby’s stool is yellow – bright mustard yellow – with about the same consistency. It almost looks like diarrhea, but not to fear, this is normal too. The change to a yellow, liquid-like stool in a positive indication that your milk has come in. The stool will stay this way until your baby begins to take in solid foods. Again, their stool may sometimes look a little green. Sometimes their stool may even have what looks like little ‘seeds’ in it. These variations of color and consistency are normal and perfectly fine!

Note: If your milk has not come in by about day 4 or 5 and your baby is not stooling as they should be, it’s okay. However, you may want to talk to your healthcare professional about supplementing your baby until your milk supply is at a good level.

Urine:
Urine output, like stool output, should increase as the days progress. Sometimes with disposable diapers that are very absorbent, however, it’s difficult to determine if they’re wet or not. If you’re unsure about your baby’s urine output, try this trick: put a tissue or piece of toilet paper into your baby’s diaper. If it’s wet, he’s urinated. Simple!

The urine should be clear or light yellow. If it’s dark yellow (or any other color), you should talk to your doctor as it could indicate a problem.

In the very early days before your milk has come in, you might notice what looks like blood or red “brick dust” in your baby’s urine. Don’t be alarmed! It’s not blood; it’s uric acid crystals, which are common. These crystals are normal in the first few days, however if they persist past this point, it could mean that your baby’s intake is not where it should be. Again, you may want to talk to your healthcare professional if you have concern.

Continue to be vigilant about checking your baby’s diapers at each change, for at least the first few weeks. It’s the simplest way to monitor their progress, and along with weight gain and behavioral cues, will let you know that your baby is receiving the nourishment they need.

Diaper “Reading” Tips:

• The number of stools your baby has should correspond to her days of life, and levels off at around 4-8 stools per day.
• The minimum amount of stools she should have per day is 4. This may reduce around weeks 5-7.
• Urine output should follow stool output, with the color being clear or light yellow.

This information is courtesy of Bravado Designs,  the brand synonymous with nursing women and their success for eighteen years.

Heather Kelly is a Lactation Consultant and specialist for Bravado Designs. Heather is an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant practicing in NYC since 2001.

Want to learn more? www.bravadodesigns.com